Some things you just have to see to understand and believe. This note was taped to one of those little windows on my garage door. The only thing you need to prepare yourself is that this was posted on June 25th (the date on the letter), and “Ashton Park” is probably a typo for the neighborhood I sort of live in, “Ashford Park.”

Please enjoy clicking here to read the lovely note.

If you have recommendations on places to move (preferably other states), feel free to let me know.

I should also mention that my scanner has essentially blackmailed me. It refused to work, so I ordered a new scanner. When I ordered the new scanner, the old one started working again for no discernable reason. I believe the driver is parsing my emails.