A few weeks ago I had this strange dream. In it, I had, for some reason, agreed to be cryogenically frozen. The weird thing was I was going to be cryogenically frozen now, not when I died. They were just going to put me in a freezer. They were compensating me though, just in case it killed me I guess, with $10,000.

So a fedex package comes and it’s some frozen syringe. It was bright red, maybe even glowing. I look down and start reading some instructions which explain that this basically slows down my heart so they can freeze me earlier.

It is at this point — not earlier like one would assume — that I realize this is a pretty stupid idea. It hits me, this sudden moment of clarity, “hey, slowing down my heart rate to near-fatal levels… well, that just seems dumb.”

At that point the little syringe is starting to warm up, at which point I think it would explode. So I’m thinking of how to get rid of the syringe in time, otherwise I’ll have to inject it into myself and slow my heart down, which I am now abject to do.

Unfortunately, that’s when I woke up. I have no idea why but the whole dream creeped me out to no end — I had what could be referred to as the jubblies pretty much the whole day. Maybe it’s because it’s a secret indication that every man has a price, and mine is quite low.