Brian stole and then devoured my delicious lunch I had been looking forward to eating all day. Without so much as even asking, or, say, MENTIONING to me.

What kind of person would just STEAL the lunch of one’s roommate? A bad person, that’s what. I’m hungry and I have nothing to eat, because my chicken has been stolen. And if you know anything about me, you’ll know one thing — I like chicken. Especially eating it, but also looking at it, too.