The Spam Drama
                          Conspired By Jim Reardon

                                   ACT III
                                   -------

Scene One: The president's favorite cheese stand, in Los Cruises, Bermuda
Triangle.  The cheese stand - Joe's.  The song on the juke box - Joe's a
money grubbing non-velveeta-wearing dork wanabe G.Q. homey-g-krad-elite-dood.

Juke Box:       Joe, you should be shot,
        and after that thee rot!
        You don't hire union!!!!
        And I'm Mister Bunion!!!

Joe: Turns off Juke Box <Remember, this isn't president Joe>.

Bob: I am here with your 100% non-velveeta cheese, where don't you want it?*

* - Note, that Bob, the guy from the cheese store, is a full service man.
He will toss the cheese all over the room for no extra charge.  How nice!

Amy: Hey, Bob, did you know I just inhereted a movie theater?

Bob: No, really?

Amy: No, I'm lying to you.  But seriously, I need two actors to star in a
"Let's all go to the lobby, let's all go to the lobby, let's all go to the
lobby, to get ourselves a snack" commercial.  Plus, do you know any gigantic
pop cups or gummy bears that would cooperate?  They'd earn minimum wage.*

* - At the current moment, minimum wage is $5 million.  Maximum wage is set
at $5.  No I didn't mix them up.

Bob: Well, you can get that old guy with no teeth, he looks like a gummy bear.

Amy: No he doesn't, stupid.

Bob: Oh, that's right.  Well, let's go kill the president.

Amy: Is it act 3 already?

Bob: Yup.

Scene 2: Nowhere special.

Bob: There he is.

Amy: Yup.

Bob: Here's my cow, go kill him.

Amy: No, you do it.

Bob: Ok.

<Bob takes cow, puts it in a quite odd position, attacks the president with
it, and kills him.>